Lost Chances

While it may be true that the lessons we learned in the past, along with the resolve to do better despite these shortcomings, have a way of improving the present-day 'you', there can always be times where we encounter a situation that just opens our eyes and shouts into our hearts something we've long tried to hide. For some people, this may be some sort of trivial, immature habit that just keeps coming back. For the unfortunate few though, this little comeback may involve matters that affect more than the literal - it also affects the emotional.

Of course, I'm not going to talk about the clique of people that gets cast out in society because they're either too worried, or they're just plain misunderstood. This post will certainly touch the 'emo' side of things though, but to look at it on the general level of 'emo' would be depriving yourselves the chance to relate to a real message hidden between these lines. So here goes.

Entitlement is something that's gone from being exclusive, to just plain self-proclaimed. It is this certain two-sided characteristic that allows confusion to come into the picture, and eventually make it's mark on a few good people. How can you really give a clear definition of entitlement? Are mutual feelings good enough to allow you to be secure in a relationship? Can passed-along talk about people and happenings be enough to conclude that something is really happening the way you interpret the situation? These are just some questions that I've come to face the past two days, and quite honestly, I believe they're not healthy at all.

There must have been some reason why I loved being a hibernating caveman for the past summer break - it was only then that I could take some time to think about people, about life, without any outside interference and outside influence. And I was lead to thinking that all would be alright once I stopped being a caveman. But what really happened was that I was more than fortunate to have a blessed group of people that welcomed me back into society. I came to realize that only a few days back, because as I went along the daily college-related chores, I found myself lost again. There were a lot of things I didn't want, a lot of things I wanted to change and improve. What was hard though is that a system is more than capable of eating you up once you delve yourself so deep into it. And boy, did I get to receive a big slap on the face for this.

You can't blame people for overreacting to certain events - some of which have no basis at all and are conjured upon by the most tactless, selfish of all people. This pretty much makes the challenge a tad bit more...challenging. The real test couldn't come any sooner. All those hours of contemplation and resolve will finally get to meet it's better match - and only a fight to the death can prove it's value and show us it's true worth.

I don't want to go into general conclusiveness, but for all the bullshit that I'm going through for it, this must be pretty much worth it.

For something that's got the capability of bringing people to new heights, I just want to get this over with.

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here we go again.